Wednesday, May 21, 2008

POSTPARTUM PARADISE






for all those birth story junkies, i know i'm one of them, this is not "the story" but i promise that is coming soon. les snapped two pictures prior to luke's birth but if he had taken pictures during transition i think i would have beat him with the camera. i am not a happy person during this time. and can i get a "are you freakin insane to all the birth orgasm people"? i think you people are full of it! that's right folks it's a postpartum paradise around here.

the following is a list of things to remember next time i am super eager to give birth to baby number four, oh yes there will be a number four!:

- looking six months pregnant is super cute when you are actually six months pregnant, not soo much after you've had the baby.

- the joy of engorgement, enough said! although I think it is God's way of helping out the postpartum woman by giving her a gianormous rack to help draw attention away from the gianormous and quite scary postpartum belly. God you totally rock and I'm totally serious about that!!!

- La la la LOCHIA! this seriously must be some kind of cruel joke.

- either you get a lazy latcher or a starved pirannha. luke happens to be a pirannha and i think he may have just sucked off my left nipple.

-have i mentioned lochia yet? just when you think it's going away it rears it's ugly head back in full force.

-going from full tilt preggo hormones to nursing hormones is no fun for anyone. lovin the hot flashes and waking up covered in sweat!

- contractions just aren't nearly as fun AFTER YOU"VE HAD THE BABY!!!

- two words arthritis flare-up!!

- pooping is more terrifying than the thought of pushing out a real life baby after giving birth.

-once that cute brown baby has officially arrived, i instantly start forgetting about how much i whined during the entire pregnancy and i ready to do it all over again!

I THOUGHT I ALREADY GAVE BIRTH TO THIS CHILD

ABBIE

LUKE

LUKE, I MEAN ABBIE

LUBBIE

UHHH....

HOW THE HECK SHOULD I KNOW?