Friday, March 12, 2010

TOO DEEP FOR WORDS

Last night as I was reading Romans 8 the following verse struck me.

"In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not
know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for
us with groanings too deep for words;" Romans 8:26

How I've missed this verse before boggles mind. I so love how the
bible is living and breathing and cuts straight to the marrow.

Today I was at a sweet friends house and I found out she could sew.
Out of nowhere I asked if she could teach me how to sew. For some
woman this question wouldn't seem like a big deal. The gravity of this
question for me is huge. To put it bluntly, if I had died five years
ago this kind of a question would have made me turn over in my grave.

As I was thinking about the changes God has so graciously made in my
life Romans 8:26 came to mind. I am not wise enough to even know how
to truly pray for myself yet the Spirit prays for me with groanings
too deep for words. Too deep for words? The mere thought of that makes
my breath catch in my chest. It's almost more than my little human
mind can handle. The utmost love of that kind of prayer and the life
change I've reaped because of it is in itself too deep for words.

I would have never prayed to have my heart change the way it has about
being a wife and a mother. Les reminded me this evening that the
reason why we got married in April instead of March was because of
college basketball. This by the way was per MY request not his. I was
a March Maddness junkie. Okay maybe not a junkie but I watched plenty
of games and knew what was going on in the world of college ball. I
loved it! Now I can't even remember the last game I've watched and I
hardly even remember the love I once had for it. As a wife and momma
to four amazing kids basketball has lost it's appeal.

I believe God loved me enough to pray for that heart change. He knew I
would have no idea how great being a wife and mom could actually be
that He prayed that my hard heart would change. Change and heal it has
and I'm so thankful.

Deep groanings too deep for words. May my heart begin to be that
greatful for the Lover of my soul.


Sent from my iPhone

ALL, ALWAYS & EVERYTHING

Today is the day I learned that God uses even the ordinary and mundane
things in life for His glory. This morning was an exceptionally rowdy
morning in Brown Town. Les was running late and neither of us had
gotton around to packing a lunch for him. As he was headed out I told
him I'd pack lunches and meet him at Church for lunch out on the
playground. At this time I hadn't yet realized that my beloved iPhone
was MIA and was located in Les's pocket. Generally when Les and I make
plans on the fly we call each other to confirm later. With four young
kiddos anything can change on a moments notice. Phoneless I figured if
I could get to church before 12 I could meet up with Les before he
left to meet us up at home.

Trying to wrangle four kids in clothes, socks, shoes and pack lunch
for a family of six is no easy feat. Throw in a teething baby and it
makes for an adventurous morning. By the way are socks and shoes even
necessary? It's hard enough to convience two ferral boys to allow me
to dress them all the while verbally prodding my budding fashionista
to just pick something to wear. Having to find three little pairs of
matching socks plus three complete sets of shoes makes it almost
virtually impossible to EVER get out the door.

By the time I had finally gotten all five of us ready it was after
12pm. I knew there was a chance Les could be headed our way but I sent
out a quick flair prayer hoping Les would stay put. When we finally
got to church I saw our sexy car, the wagon, in the parking lot. When
we ran into Les, he said he was glad he had gotten held up or else we
would have missed each other. He had forgotten his car key in his
office. At that moment "Always give thanks in everything" popped into
my head. I'm sure at the time forgetting his key in his office was an
annoyance. Yet if he hadn't, we would have been like two ships sailing
past each other.

Something about this simple situation hit me today. How many times do
I get frustrated or complain about the minor or major annoyances in
life? What about all those times those annoyances get in the way of
me exiting the door when I'm already running behind. Am I giving
thanks in those times? In those times how is God using those
situations for His good? I can't possibly know or even begin to
understand. Yet Romans 8:28 clearly states that God causes ALL things
to work together for His good. The bible doesn't say some things or
even most things, it says ALL things.

ALL things. The poop that happens right before we try to leave, the
left turn I missed, the misunderstanding I have with my husband, the
dog and child pee on the carpet, ALL things. If God is using ALL
things for His good then it only seems right to ALWAYS give thanks in
EVERYTHING.

ALL, ALWAYS and EVERYTHING are pretty overwhelming words. Those words
will never be used to describe me yet they are incredibly appropriate
to describe the God of the universe. He's ALL I truly need and He
ALWAYS loves me and He wants to be my EVERYTHING.

ALWAYS give thanks in EVERYTHING. Give thanks for those fits for it's
teaching me to love Give thanks for the messes for it's teaching to
serve. Give thanks for four children who have completely different
agendas than mine for it's teaching me patience. Give thanks for my
absent mindedness for who knows how many times the time I spent
looking for my keys had more impact than I will ever know this side of
heaven. These things seem easier than the big ones.

Would I be able to give thanks if one day the diagnosis was cancer?
Could I give thanks if one singular event caused my world to turn
upside down? I think I could if I truly believed God causes ALL things
for His good. I have head knowledge of this but I can't say my heart
ALWAYS believes this.

I believe the Apostle Paul ALWAYS knew and believed this. That's why
his ministry was so effective. Paul WAS thankful in ALL circumstances.
How attractive would that be? Paul wrote that he learned how to be
that way. I want to learn how to be that way. Please help remind me
of this next time you hear me complaining.

God I am nothing but a vapor. It's because of you that I'm even able
to choose you. I would be way too foolish on my own. I thank you that
you alone are Sovereighn over ALL things and that you work ALL things
out for YOUR glory. Help me to remember this life is not about me or
my comfort but about you!

Love,
Your Messy Yet Beloved Daughter

Sent from my iPhone

Wednesday, March 03, 2010

MARKER

not quite sure what it is about adding a new member of the family that
causes sweet Abbie to want to mark her territory all over the house.
Thought it might be a fluke when #3 came onto the scene but we've got
a repeat with #4. wonder how many additions we'll go through before
this stops. willing to have ten more just to find out!